POST 200

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

If God sent angels onto this Earth, it must be the people around me. Every single one of them. Today was a really good day. I don't think that I could pick out one thing that was not good. I really needed today.. just to have God let me know that I can be happy. Even after everything, I can still be happy. Thinking about that makes me feel a bit more relieved. This past month everything has been going downhill. Relationships, friends, school, family. Everything. Not a hair has slipped by that wasn't bad. Somehow... everything that happened today, the laughter, the cold, the people, pictures, it just soothed me a bit. Washed my worries away.. even if it was just briefly. That was enough to recharge my nasty old batteries. Thank God.

By today I mean yesterday as I am writing this at 2:24 in the morning. This blog post started yesterday, I promise haha.

Well... it's getting late, but I don't feel like sleeping yet, but..... Good night!

I Think I'm Going Crazy

I. Seriously. Can't. Drive.

I find that for some reason. The more I drive, the more I fear for the next time I drive. Today was a terrific example of as to why the world would be a much more peaceful place without me driving. I should just hire a personal chauffeur. Like seriously. Right now, as I sit here, I honestly think that I will receive a ticket in the mail. And like always, I can't stop thinking about it. I thought that driving yesterday was actually pretty good, and I felt better about everything. AND THEN I JUST HAD TO GET LOST AND FEEL SO FLUSTERED TO THE POINT WHERE I NO LONGER KNEW WHAT I WAS DOING ON THE ROAD. AND WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MR. POLICEMAN WHY???????????? WHY DID YOU HAVE TO HONK AT ME??? I TRIED TO GIVE YOU ENOUGH ROOM, REALLY, AND HONESTLY, I DID!!!!!!!!! T_T

and....
I still haven't gone up to Nosehill by myself yet. I don't think that's going to happen anymore.

Bits and Pieces

Yeah, gotta start
Looking at the hand of the time we've been given here
This is all we got and we gotta start thinkin' it
Every second counts on a clock that's tickin'
Gotta live like we're dying
We only got 86 400 seconds in a day
To turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say,
Gotta live like we're dying

To think that it's too late to say the things that you want to say from the bottom of your heart is really just an excuse. I can't say that now, because I still have the chance to tell the people I love how I do love them, just how much I care about them and just how much they mean to me. On the contrary, right now my heart is bending backwards and forwards with a lot of movement, it's making me sick. I can't help but regret all the time I've kept my mouth shut and feeling all the wrong emotions. In that way... I can't stop blaming myself for a lot of the things that have happened lately. I really do wonder why everything bad has to happen at the exact same time. One would think that these events are just for a little while, but... no. It's not like that. Actually it's more like, more and more issues happened one after the other and began to pile up unresolved. Everything happening is like a slap in the face, a shove into the sideline and a round-house kick to top it off. Kind of like the cherry on top of the ice cream... except it's not so sweet. It's a bitter cherry.

To honestly say, i haven't been thinking in the right mind and I'm finding my way back onto the path to be so hard. However, I can't deny the fact that throughout all these problems I'm having, God has been there 101% of the time. He's probably given more than I could give my life to thank him. I'm really grateful God has given me the time, and the reminders that I've been missing. As I write this, things become more and more clear that I have to take the chances he's giving me to do something about it, and to use it in the way I want to make Him proud. These past months... these past years... I've been nothing but a disappointment.

I pray for healing and for guidance, not just for me, but for anyone who needs it too.


Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is mighty to save,
He is mighty to save
Forever, author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave

1 + 1 = Window

4 out of 5 people agreed that 1 person out of the 5 will always disagree with the other 4.
(Haha) I really enjoyed that.

ANYWAYSSSSSSS....
So calculus has officially caused my brain explode a series of times HOWEVER... these explosions were done in a very satisfied way as... I enjoyed thinking how that problem actually worked.
Another thing is... WHY ON EARTH HAVE I NEVER LEARNED SIMILAR TRIANGLES?? This absurdity has caused me much frustration.
I need to do well in calculus T_T

I'm beginning to really like physics for some reason. The math and theory... okay it doesn't always make sense to me but i really like the math behind it... or physicscal mathism behind it o_O ALSO, I have no idea what's going on in Chemistry... this may be due to the fact that I have not done hw for that class in a long time... wow.... go figure.

WELLL. It's that time again... to do hw -cough-sudoku/brainage-cough-
Good night world.